Recent Battles -

yes! to finally posting again.

Have you ever felt that you've been enjoying the process of reaching milestones after milestones of growth until one day things quickly go downhill and before you know it, you're back on day 1. arghhh.. Yes I have been battling with so many of my weaknesses (money! I suck at that :P) being relatively materialistically high maintenance, i humbly have to admit that either I don't spend money, but when i do, it's usually on nice things that are expensive to be most direct :P It's truly humbling and sobering these couple of days when I realized that I'm serious broke.I cannot be more serious!! arghh..not good! People usually know when I'm embarrassed but this is really kinda tough to face. But the more I think about this struggle and why I'm struggling, an inkling sparked in me saying: "Keep fighting, the battle is not done yet." I knew it was God's voice; the same voice that was cheering on King David and strengthening him when he battled against his enemies.

I feel like I'm in the same boat as King David in 2 Samuel, battling against my greatest enemies. The whole book talks about the king being chased after by people that either envied Him, including his son or friends that him or Saul had once offended. He had to leave Jerusalem and escape from place to place. He has wounded the heart of God and betrayed people like Uriah that once respected him so much.

I'm far from physically finding myself in a battling field, :) but all the events that David faced in 2 Samuel described the roller coasters that has been going around in cirlces in my head. My soul felt like being chased after by weaknesses that I know I cannot battle on my own.

2 Samuel 19:2

And for the whole army the victory that day was turned into mourning, because on that day the troops heard it said, "The king is grieving for his son."

What can cause greater despair and grief than to lose a son. Every sense of victory stripped away and mourning came upon David. However in the rest of the chapters, you can see his change of heart and mind and begins to praise to God again when he battled. God did continue to be faithful in bringing him ultimate victory wherever he went; who turned his mourning into dancing and weakness into strength. This is encouraging because the same God is great in battle when I face my giant and enemies who will bring me victory wherever I need to fight. amen.